I've decided that I'm going to start some "me time".  Stop focusing on all that's going on around me & focus on bettering myself.  Getting my life on track & in order.  Doing things for me.  Doing things that make me happy.  Seems like for months now, maybe years, I've been so concerned with making those around me happy & impressing them.  Why?  Why do I bother I wonder when my happiness is the very last thing on their minds.  So I figured, the only one whos going to worry about my happiness is me.  I've been so stressed out.  The cold weather & having a cold hasn't really helped matters much.  It's financially as usual that my stress is centered.  I'm always stressin over money & bills.  I think most people are but most people don't have a man that lies to them about what bills are paid & which bills aren't.  *grr*

     My kids are happy I think.  That's obviously important to me.  Anyone else, nope sorry, not really my concern.  Wanna know why?  Refer to the 1st paragraph.  Depend on no one else to give you what you want.  If you want to be happy than make yourself happy cause this smile machine is outta business.  That's not to say that I'm just going to alienate everyone who's been so supportive of me.  I'm just saying that I need to focus on making myself happy for now.  This summer was one of the best, & also most stress filled of my entire life.  I was diagnosed as mildly bi-polar (whatever that means) & clinically depressed.  With extreme OCD! LOL!  Go figure.  I've always known that I'm OCD.  I was diagnosed as ADHD around 15 & I know that it's Adult ADD now.  Contributes to the OCD.  I'm just a mental mess uh? 

     Well, I need to get off here and get something out for the kids who are going to be just "starving to death" here shortly lol!  Hope everyone is having a wonderful, beautifull weekend!!